Notice who sexually arouses you. Being gay means that you have a sexual preference for the same sex as your own. Look at pictures of people who are commonly viewed as “attractive” and see which sex arouses you. If you’re more aroused by people who are the same sex as you, it’s possible that you’re gay. If you find both sexes arousing, you may be bisexual.[2]

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In contrast, gay in the sense “awkward, stupid, or bad” is often used with disparaging intent and perceived as insulting to gay people. Though some have argued that this sense is independent of the “homosexual” sense, and therefore not homophobic, the argument is weakened by the fact that “homosexual” has long been the dominant meaning of gay, and thus permeates its other usages. See also homosexual.

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In contrast, gay in the sense “awkward, stupid, or bad” is often used with disparaging intent and perceived as insulting to gay people. Though some have argued that this sense is independent of the “homosexual” sense, and therefore not homophobic, the argument is weakened by the fact that “homosexual” has long been the dominant meaning of gay, and thus permeates its other usages. See also homosexual.

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This article was co-authored by Eric A. Samuels, Psy.D.. Eric A. Samuels, Psy.D. is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist in private practice in San Francisco and Oakland. He received a Psy.D. in Clinical Psychology from The Wright Institute in 2016. He specializes in working with men, young adults, and people with diverse sexual orientations and gender identities.

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I agree that this agreement is governed by the Electronic Signatures in Global and National Commerce Act (commonly known as the "E-Sign Act"), 15 U.S.C. § 7000, et seq., and by choosing to click on "I Agree. Enter Here" and indicating my agreement to be bound by the terms of this agreement, I affirmatively adopt the signature line below as my signature and the manifestation of my consent to be bound by the terms of this agreement.

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Reflect on your past relationships and how they made you feel. You can be gay even if you’ve had straight relationships in the past. Think about who you dated in the past and how comfortable you felt in the relationship. Ask yourself if you felt attracted to this person and what type of attraction you felt. This can help you figure out if you might be gay or bisexual.[4]

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First of all, being lesbian is not a disease, so there are no "symptoms" involved. If you've never had feelings for anyone, you might be somewhere on the asexual scale, or you might just be a late bloomer. Can you imagine dating someone of either gender? Can you imagine having sex with someone? Think it over. Do some research on asexuality. Most importantly, don't let your friend try to tell you who or what you are. 

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